I stumbled across a website last night. I was praying through my Operation World book for yesterday, and the country was Bangladesh. For some reason, it broke me while I was reading the facts about a country so devastatingly lost. Just tons and tons and tons of people with zero access to the Gospel. None. I was on my FB page and saw that under my “Compassion Box”, the cutest little girl’s picture had popped up. She was from Bangladesh.
I clicked on her profile. My heart hurt. I can only afford to sponsor Esther, my ridiculously awesome chica from Kenya (and my parents would beg to differ and say I can’t even afford her–they’ve never been too fond of it), but, how I would sponsor every single one of those kids if I could. I’d do it in a heartbeat. I could go on about my passion for Compassion, but, I’ll leave that for another time…or you can ask me about it! I love to talk about it! (http://www.compassion.com)
Anyway, I scrolled down and glanced over some information about the area the child lived in (I mean, praise God that Compassion is allowed to be in Bangladesh!) and my heart just…hurt. How terribly we take for granted the fact that we have ready access to the Bible. Most of us would probably say we have multiple copies and translations in our homes. We have multiple churches on every street. Dude, THOUSANDS of people in Bangladesh and MILLIONS of people worlwide have never even HEARD of Jesus. We have all the access to Bibles and Christian literature in the world, and we STILL DON’T READ IT. Ah…but, that’s another blog entirely as well.
sorry a little righteous indignation =)
For some reason, I went on google and typed in “Mission trips to Bangladesh”.
I clicked a link and it ended up leading me to something called “The World Race”
Some of you have probably heard of this. Actually, I believe I had heard of it, but, briefly in passing or something. Anyway, it’s “11 months 11 countries” mission trip. Basically, in teams of about 13 or so, you travel the world for a year serving and proclaiming Christ.
This probably would have never really appealed to me before recently. I mean, it would sound cool…for someone else. But, recently, I’ve felt an overwhelming discontetnment and disatisfaction with the norm. I can’t keep falling into complacency with “the norm”. I want a radical life that doesn’t make any sense to the world. I want God to be my obsession and the only thing I want. I want my joy to be in making Him known to the world. Man, my Jesus is too great to hoard all to myself.
ALSO, what’s super cool…I think I wrote it on here before, but, I had recently decided to begin saving up money (I have, it’s been a very slow process ha, but, it’s happening!) to go to Kenya/Uganda next summer. Well, the teams of the World Race go to BOTH of those countries. Whaaa?? i know right.
I don’t know, I could barely fall asleep last night I was so excited just thinking about it. It’s a lot of money to raise, but using lack of funds as an excuse is belittling God’s power and abilities to make things happen.
I’ve decided to keep checking the website and once the 2011 dates are posted, to send in an application and interview for a spot.
I’m not going to lie, this terrifies me. I feel completely inadequate and incapable and not right for this and every other excuse in the book, but, I want to. I believe what’s important to remember is that there are no such things as these “Super holy mega Christians” who are the only ones allowed to be missionaries. We’re all sinners saved by grace. Yes, I am unable, but, God is so so able.
I have nothing holding me back. I will graduate from college in December. I have zero plans. I don’t want to pursue the theatre career I once dreamed of. I don’t have a boyfriend. I don’t have a job. I have NOTHING holding me back from this.
I know I’m not promised the rest of tonight or tomorrow and definitely not 2011. But, I’m praying for guidance, open doors/closed ones, wisdom, discernment, and maybe an insanely crazy life changing trip around the world in 2011.
Dude, I want to be radical. The more I saturate myself in the Word, the more life the way the world sees it (and the way I’m quick to fall into seeing it), is ridiculously unappealing and so meaningless to me. I don’t want to waste my life. I’m not saying that you’re wasting your life if you don’t go on mission trips (NOT true!), but, I’m just feeling a calling. It’s weird! It’s strange! I never wanted this! But, I feel a tug…I feel like that something inside of me will scream if I don’t get out of here and love the unloved and experience Christ in His glorious works in different cultures all over the world.
I just want to beg of you, saints, don’t fall into this lie that you can have a bunch of head knowledge like Jesus died for me so I can go to Heaven, go to church on Sundays, be a “good person”, and live like everyone else, get rich, have a nice house and 2.5 kids, and live the good old American dream. I’m not saying move to India and be a missionary, all I’m saying is that’s not Christianity. That’s a cheap comfortable SAFE Christianity we’ve hand crafted to fit our individualistic self-centered Western lives. I plead with you not to let this be your reality. May your ultimate goal of life be GOD. May He be the only thing you want, and may your life reflect and embody that truth wherever you are and whatever you’re doing.
Jesus paid it all.
All to Him I owe.
Sin had left a crimson stain.
He washed it white as snow.
I love you always.