“Study the lives of the great men and women of the Scriptures throughout Church history and you will find quite an assortment of people with all kinds of temperaments, all kinds of trials and tribulations. A spirit of rebellion in some, and yet the mighty work of God was done through them. You will not find one perfect person in the whole lot. Some came close, and yet each had his or her own particular flaw. God does not work through those who are flawless, but rather in spite of their imperfections. The heart that God uses is the heart yielded to Him in faith and obedience.
The person who thinks he or she has what it takes rarely has what it takes. None of those old saints of the past ever did anything great for God in their own strength. Why, look at Samson. On the outside, he looked like an ordinary man. But when the Spirit of God came upon him, he did extraordinary exploits. He was far from being the perfect man. He was far from being a man we would want to emulate in our daily life. How God used him is the mystery of divine leadership. God will find the man or the woman who yields himself or herself so completely because the only thing that matters in his or her life is God.
Thank God for the heroes of faith, but just remember that they are dead; they left their testimony behind them for the next generation, and for the next and for the next. You are alive, your generation is everywhere about you. You must serve your generation by the will of God before you fall asleep. You cannot serve another generation; you can only serve yours. Serve your generation and then leave your reputation and your service in the kind hand of God. And when the right day comes, He may put your name with the heroes of faith and say, “By faith he…” and “By faith she…” Whether He does or not, at least you will have the delight of knowing you pleased Him, and have the joy of knowing that you have served your generation.” -A.W. Tozer. “A Disruptive Faith”.
You should probably read this book.